Reprise...

I've been thinking, and I've decided that in my heart I DO believe that there is one person in this world who is the one God has planned for me to spend my life with.

I do believe that it is possible to find and be happy with thousands of people in this world, but I believe so deeply that there is one who God wants to see me with.

Call me naive...call me whatever you like.

Yes I've been in love, yes I thought it was for life...yes I had my heart broken.
The fact that I could feel a love like that and have it fall through my hands should be enough to turn me against the 'soul-mate' concept, but it doesn't.
In fact the more I think about it the more that I find peace with it.

I was at church last night, and as I sat there I surveyed the room, and as I glanced at each of the males there...my heart was saying "he's not mine...neither is he...and he's not meant for me either..."

So how is it possible to love someone so deeply, to be convinved that your going to spend your life with this person, if they're not the 'one'? some would say that it's because there is no "One". But I would disagree...

"The heart is deceitful above all things..."
Jeremiah 17:9

Perhaps...just perhaps I got it wrong. Maybe that deceitful heart which beats within my chest convinced me that I was to spend my life with someone, who I was never supposed to be with...

just maybe...

That break-up was one of the most painful emotional rollercoasters I have been on in my short life...but when the ride ended I was able to step onto the platform, less naive, more sure of myself and who I am in Christ...
Perhaps God teaches some of the best lessons through the failings of romance, it ended up that way in my life...
But I still believe that somewhere out there is the one for me.
This is an issue I've been praying about alot lately...trusting that God would let me know.
Since I've been praying over the situation I've found incredible peace with the concept of someone out there who's designed fro me, and me for him...

"I will bless the Lord who has given me counsel; my heart also instructs me in the night seasons"
Psalm 16:7
In this case the original translation of the word 'Heart' would be closer to 'Kidney' or 'conscience' If I'm asking God for answers to something, I don't believe that he'll give me anything fake,

"...my conscience also bearing witness in the holy spirit..."
Romans 9:1

I guess more than anything else, if I have it wrong I believe I'll get told that...But untill I learn that for myself, I'm going to find it impossible to believe it any other way...it needs to be real to me, and right now I find peace in the belief that there is one person out there for me, and so long as I trust Gods voice, his plan then I will find him.

But seriously, will I ever know? Will I ever know that there was or wasn't "One" designed for each?

Not before I hit heaven, and knick Gods ear for a good chat about all the quessies I have for him...

Untill then, I'm gonna trust the kidneys, the conscience and trust that God won't lead me wrong.